Common Marriage Problems – Not Making an Effort
It’s so tempting to take things easy once the ring is on your finger. So many of us decide
that the hard work is done and that going forward a marriage doesn’t require any effort. One of the most common
marriage problems is to just take a back seat, let life pass you by and assume that married life is for every no matter how
little effort you make.
The ‘marriage is easy’ assumption has never been so
wrong. Married life is hard work especially for those that have been used to living life their own way. There are so many things to
disagree over and have differing opinions on. It’s so easy to assume and a common marriage
problem to believe that your partner should think like you, have the same ideas as you and want the same as you do. Such an
assumption has never been further from the truth.
I should imagine that most of you have heard the saying
‘opposites attract’ and it’s very true. Look at the number of couples you see walking down the street and think about how many of them you
look at and wander just why they are together. It’s really common in marriage for partners to seem a bad fit but it only becomes a problem
when couples don’t except their individuality. When people accept what they are and who
they have married opposites can really work and complement each other but one of the most common marriage problems is to try and turn
partners into something they will never be.
What couples have to remember is that people might
loose their rough edges, learn a few things or might mellow over time but deep down they are always who you married warts and all.
Couples have to learn to accept their partners for what they are, pull together to make the partnership work and learn what marriage truly
means. It’s a really common marriage problem to bail out when marriage isn’t quite the fairy tale that it was expected to be but
in our marriage vows we state ‘for better, for worse, to death do we part’, that doesn’t mean ‘until the going gets
Admittedly, there are a few actions and indiscretions that no one can be expected to forgive, but for a lot of married couples divorce is just used as an easy
and a lazy way out. Rather than fixing a few small common marriage problems couples tend to just let them ride and fail to even accept what
is happening to their marriage until it gets to a point when a lot of hard work has to be done to turn the marriage
The secret to a perfect marriage isn’t to marry a
clone, its learning how to accept each other, making an effort to understand each other, learning how to communicate and knowing how to recognise and fix those little niggly common marriage
problems before they escalate out of control.